The Liver Life Project
The Alcohol Mindset
Understanding the Alcohol Mindset
Ask
any
person
with
an
addiction
problem
whether
it
be
drugs
or
alcohol,
and
they’ll
tell
you
that
alcohol
is
the
hardest
form
of
addiction
to
deal
with.
But
you
are
NOT
powerless,
it
just
takes
support
and
a
willingness
to
succeed.
It
has
nothing
to
do
with
religion,
it’s
about
willpower
and
determination.
Having
said
that,
not
all
people
who
have
an
alcohol
problem,
have
an
addiction issue too.
There are several support groups out there, and some people I know have been put off by the “Alcoholics Anonymous” approach. But, having
said that I fully understand that if a person finds this approach helpful, then that can only be a good thing, as a lot of people have found a life
of total sobriety using this method of recovery. If on the other hand, you are put off by this spiritualist approach, don’t give up, there are other
options available to you.Another thing I want to try and get across is the definition of two widely used words these days called, “Binge
Drinking”, and an alcohol “Bender”. Sometimes the term "binge drinking" is confused with "bender". Some people believe that warnings
against binge drinking are warning against going on multiple day bout of intoxication, but that is not what binge drinking is all abo
Binge
drinking
is
drinking
five
or
more
drinks
in
any
one
drinking
session
for
both
men,
and
women
alike,
It’s
the
Friday
night
culture
mindset
thing,
that
takes
place
in
nearly
every
town
and
city
in
the
country,
“
I’m
going
out
tonight
and
I’m
going
to
get
totally
off
my
face”
,
or
“I’m
getting
completely
bladdered
tonight”
.
Harmful
drinking
can
occur
long
before
it
reaches
the
level
of a bender. While going on a bender might be considered self-destructive behaviour, simply drinking five beers or a bottle of wine in one day is considered hazardous drinking.
An alcohol bender is a multiple-day drinking spree during which the person does not eat and gets very little sleep. If you're on a bender, you might pass out for a short time, wake up
and start drinking again. A bender does not refer to one evening of intoxication. It refers to a drinking spree that is extended over at least two or more days.
S
adly
for
years,
we’ve
always
laughed
at
people
and
alcohol
abuse.
We
just
seem
to
laugh
it
off.
Alcohol
abuse
is
no
laughing
matter
and
can
have
serious
and
often
fatal
consequences.
Visit
any
A&E
hospital
department
on
a
Friday
or
Saturday
night
and
see
the
harm
people
do
to
themselves,
and
others.
(I
do
believe
the
train
sequence
in
this
video
to
be
fake,
but
it
does illustrate the point pretty well)
ArLD - Victims of Circumstance
For many years I have been offering help, advice and support to people over on a highly respected “HealthUnlocked” website:
https://healthunlocked.com/
Over time, it has brought home to
me the many reasons why a person goes on to develop an alcohol-related medical condition in the first place.It is reckoned, that some 84% of people who go on to develop a serious liver
condition drink alcohol because they choose to. The remaining 16% are those who now have an alcohol addiction, they are now drinking because they have to. So, Alcohol abuse falls into
two categories. Those who have an alcohol problem, and those who have an alcohol addiction.
Sadly many local alcohol support services don’t differentiate between the two categories. They find it easier to just label everyone the same and call them “Alcoholics”. This just adds to
stigmatise and alienate people. For many, this title becomes an invisible badge of shame.
Where to Start
To start, I often like to use, what I refer to as the “Cause and Effect” analogy. For many people who go on to develop a drinking problem, The reason behind their need to drink can become
lost over time. Most often or not, there is a deep-rooted past issue in their life that makes them want to feel better about themselves. To help blank out a traumatic experience, or to help
someone gain confidence from within, even to try and help deal with feelings of guilt, despair, and loneliness.
I often refer to the following two cases as examples. These are both two true stories of people who posted up asking for help on a well respected, online liver support group site. Obviously,
I’ll protect the person's anonymity.
The first case involves a lady who was in her late 30’s, who now has a cirrhotic liver through ArLD. It took a few weeks of exchanging messages to gain this lady's trust. She finally told me that
some 11 years previous, she had gone out on a Friday night with some friends and had been raped on the way home. For 11 years this lady hadn’t ever told anyone, not even her GP or other
members of her family. She had blamed herself and would seek solace in alcohol. Alcohol became her coping mechanism to help her blank out the traumatic event and also to help her cope
with the guilt.
Had this poor lady gotten the help she needed at the time, she’d most likely have a perfectly healthy liver today.
The second case refers to a young lady in her early 20s who, once again used alcohol as a form of self-medication and a coping mechanism. She too now had liver cirrhosis.
Her story goes back to when she was just 14 years old. She was witnessing her father and mother having a heated row. She remembers crying and wanting to try and stop them but was too
scared. She witnessed her father murder her mother. That evening she became robbed of the love and affection of not only her mother but also that of her father who was arrested and
given a life sentence for his wife’s murder. This young lady ended up in the care system, where she spent the rest of her teens and early 20s blaming herself for not having the courage to
stand up and protect her mother. For her, alcohol abuse became a daily need to help blank out the traumatic experience.
“Cause and Effect”
Both of these ladies experienced a traumatic event, none of which were of their own making. These ladies became victims of other people's actions, all through no fault of their own. Many
people have difficulty mentally processing the cruel actions of others. This then leads the victim to seek their own form of self-medication to make them feel better and emotionally stronger.
In both these examples, the original actions of others become the “Cause”. The use of alcohol as a form of self-medication becomes the “Effect”. If a person could have been given emotional
help and support at the time, i.e. treating the “cause”, then the “effect” would have become redundant, and not needed.
Behind every person who develops a problem with alcohol, there is a story waiting to be told. That man, drunk on a park bench, we just see a broken person and look upon them with disgust
and disdain. What we don’t see is a man who has completed two tours in Afghanistan and seen his best friend blown to bits.
For a while now, I have been involved with some liver medical students. Here I talk about my liver journey and of my liver transplant experience, all from a personal perspective. I always
conclude with the following advice. “Always try and treat the patient and not just treat the physical condition”. Once again, the “Effect” is the liver damage and the “Cause” is the alcohol.
The need to look beyond the cause is so important.
Many young people from disadvantaged families tend to suffer the most. Those childhood experiences shape the way they’ll become in adulthood. Those early life skills and teachings that
are passed down from previous generations are so important in shaping the person of the future.
Those young children who end up in the care system all through no fault of your own, can already become damaged and mentally scarred. They can feel unloved, rejected and unwanted.
They may feel a failure they can lack ambition and have little sense of purpose or direction.
Some of these young people may be fostered, and find love and support from an adopted family, while others may be unsuitable and remain within the care home environment. When the
latter reaches the age of adulthood, they are on their own. Many lack any basic life skills. They may feel lost and have no ambition or drive. Many just want to blank out the day and lock
themselves away inside an invisible protective bubble away from the outside world.
Alcohol and drug abuse becomes a daily occurrence. The only priority in their life is to find that next fix, so they can continue to blank out the loveless world again. Where I happen to live in
North Staffordshire, there are presently 1100 children within the care system. Some of these will end up as rough sleepers on the local streets and only get to know the seedie drug
underworld. They too are all victims.
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